Brain Wipes

Just when you think you can safely predict what your child is going to say or do, they go ahead and surprise the heck out of you. In a good way, I mean. Our 20 year old daughter just shocked both of us by handling a difficult situation with grace and maturity. My husband and I were prepared for a long, drawn out family discussion that would probably culminate in an emotional scene. Instead, she showed us that she really is growing up. Now I realize that this new evidence of maturation, as good as it looks, can be short lived because teh research shows that young adults in their early 20's can go in and out of their new ability to think logically. This is due to the fact that they experience a succession of "brain wipes," a term Annette has coined for when the young brain wipes out weaker dendrites in order that the strong survive. This can happen up to 3 times as the late adolescent matures and develops. So, I am trying not to get too excited over the fact that we might have successfully passed a developmental marker because I know that in a few days, she could melt down over something that looks pretty trivial to us. But, for now, let me just take a deep breath and revel in the fact that this coaching stance we have taken for the past 5 years is for the moment, working!